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Sherlock
Holmes:
"The dog’s jaw, as shown in the space between these marks, is
too broad in my opinion for a terrier and not broad enough for a
mastiff. It may have been–yes, by Jove, it is a
[duck!]"
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (1859–1930)
The
Hound of the Baskervilles
 ECONOMY,
PA (USA)
— Elementary, my dear Wagson; the mystery has been
solved. But first, let's review the facts:
At about 11:00pm on the night of Saturday, April 20, a stout, old
Beagle was seen wandering down Second Avenue. Jason Kratochvil,
20, and his friends approached the shadowy stranger and were
surprised to hear it quack.
"We thought it was him," Jason told the Beaver
County Times. But presently there emerged from behind the
silhouette of the portly pooch a grey-headed duck. The two
wandering animals had apparently been traveling together and were
close companions. Still, it remained to be answered: why
were they together, where did they come from, and what
are you supposed to feed them (duck food or dog food)? 
Waddle it be? Quackers or kibble?
(Photo: Clif Page / The
Times)
The answer to that question came soon enough
when the duck, snubbing the crackers offered him, decided to stick his
bill into the bowl of Kibbles 'n' Bits that his canine pal was
given. After sharing their meal, the mysterious duo curled up on
the Kratochvils' laundry room floor and went to sleep, the duck with
his head buried in the dog's pepper-colored fur. Next, Jason's
sister Nicole telephoned the police and asked if anyone had recently
filed a missing duck report. After convincing them that the call
wasn't a prank, then after listening to them laugh hysterically for a
while, Nicole provided the authorities with the necessary
information. But the police were baffled. So the Kratochvil
family decided to accommodate their guests until further notice.
"Right now, we have tree frogs and crickets," said Jason's
mother Juanita. "It's just amazing what boys will bring
home. I've seen all kind of creatures." The next day,
they called the local newspaper.
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The break in the case occurred on Monday after the Times
ran the story of the odd couple. Neighbor Gerard Vrabely had
just arrived at work that morning and noticed the headline and picture as
a colleague was flipping through the paper.
"I said, 'That's him. That's my dog and that's Mr.
Duck,' " the man said.
Mr. Vrabely had been searching for the two fugitives
since Saturday morning. "When I didn't find feathers or fur, I
figured they'd come back that night," he said. "I never expected
this."
At around 6:00am—at
the quack of dawn, Mr. Vrabely telephoned the Kratochvils and identified
"Blackie" the Beagle (described with a limp and a bump in his snout)
and "Mr. Duck" the duck (described as... well, as a duck).
"You had me worried for two days," he told the
pair yesterday afternoon after picking them up and returning with them to
his 8.6-acre farm on on Tevebaugh Road, about a quarter-mile away.
Gerard had inherited the animals along with the farm
from his late father, John Sr., who had Blackie for years and who acquired
Mr. Duck as one of six Ohio ducklings nearly four years ago.
According to Gerard, the other five ducks died
over the years, leaving Mr. Duck alone. Without his own kind to
cavort with, Mr. Duck took to Blackie the Beagle, who was more than happy
to assume the role of guardian for his new feathered friend.
Although Beagles generally remain true to their duck-hunting instincts,
there are exceptions.
"They feel safer together," says Gerard, indicating that the
two are inseparable. They play in a nearby creek, sleep together and
share food. Mr. Duck, 4, has learned to stick close to Blackie, 13, for protection, which is presumably how the mischievous
fowl can get away with stealing food from the eight farm cats also living
on the property.
Case Closed. Mr. Duck and Blackie are back
home at Gerard Vrabely's farm. (Photo: Clif Page / The
Times)
"I've never had a problem with them," says Gerard.
"This is the first time. These are my bad kids. They're grounded."
That's nothing new for Blackie, who never could fly to begin
with. In fact, the only real difference between a dog and a duck is
that a duck has wings.
...but, of course, that's a matter of a pinion.
§§§
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